The reason of my absence

[lostmaiden]

Every time I come here I like to be cheerful and help someone with something. I want to feel useful. I know that you like me the way I am, I like you all the way you are and accept all that, but since this place is so special to me, I like to try my best and be better for you all. After breaking up in June with my bf (we were together for almost 2 years), I got to be with Doriu, the one that is a user on this forum too. But I don't know, after that break up, I started changing, starting to have the courage to be myself. Doriu inspired me in some ways and I finally opened myself to the world the way I truly am and since then I feel free and powerful, everything I put in mind I can realize. But the thing is that, who knows, maybe even because while I was with Doriu I was chainging, and he was and he still is changing too, the relationship did not go well, and we broke up. But we are still friends and I still like talking to him.
After we broke up, I had to quit my job, because I was pissed offa t my boss who did not give me a month's salary and I had some time off and no money. Plus, some neighbours tryed to fool me and say that one of the pipes in my apartment was broken and then started lieing around about some stuff, but I managed to scare them in such a way that they do not aproach me anymore. Then I found another job at a fast-food place. This will be my fifth week since I work there and my last one, because the boss there (one of them at least), who hasn;t got an ideea what ppl have to do in each shift, made an ironic remark that I was lazy and that I need others to do my work for me. But it's his problem now, he is running out of staff anyway. While working there I met a boy who is really nice and everything, the guy of my dreams, but guess what? I cannot love him no matter what! And he is so nice and everything, but no matter what he does, I cannot love him. I'll crush his heart in disappointment, but I do not think we cam be more than just friends since i cannot love him. My friends say that maybe I do not love him since he is not a 'bad boy'. Truth is that I've been so long around rockers, that I did not realize how much I enjoy talking to them.
And speaking about rockers, there is another guy that likes me. And this one is a rocker, lol! but I donno what to say about it. We have been talking a lot since I was working in the clothes shop, he always came by and stood there for hours and hours and he sent me signals, but still can't believe that a guy like him would like me.
So, I am kinda lookng for a job right now, I'm worried about the guy I mentioned before because he had a motorcycle accident (I'll kick his ass for not taking care of himself after he gets better, that's for sure!), and also I am about to crush a poor inocent boy's heart... What else there is to say? Oh, yeah, lol, I baught from a second hand store a beautiful goth dress! It needs some fixing because the sleeves are ripped, but I have a friend who will fix it and make it look like new. As soon as it is done, I willtake a picture of it while I wear it and post it on the forum (still did not get that USB cable -_-...). It looks so good that I feel in love with it, lol!

[jehovany]

I just read and wow, u have a lot in ur life right now. Im glad that u at least found another job. Hope u do find another better one though since one of the supervisors is mean.

To bad that u broke up with ur bf, u should take things slow and not look for a boyfriend. reationships are complicated, tehy stress u out too much. Thats why im glad to be single. : )

[lostmaiden]

My life was always complicated, with or without a boyfriend... It somehow got complicated since the day i was born XD. But relax, things will go my way sooner or later, think positive

[Lucy]

I'm sorry that all that had to happen. Maybe this is a new thing in your life that you need, though. Sometimes things change, and although we may not like the change so much at first, we soon realize how much good it has done us.

However, I am so very glad you have returned. Also glad to see you here again, Jehovany!

I really think we should try to stay here as long as possible. It'd be too sad if everyone just quit talking in this forum. I would miss everyone too much, and this place.

[lostmaiden]

I'd never leave this place for good! As I said before, I think of this place as my home. And even if I was not here a while, I was thinking of you guys, and I have been talking about you. Among the people I kow you have some kind of fame. They are like: Who is that Violet and when can I meet her? Lucy (from my drawings) is sweet! And whoever met Jehovany when he came by loved him:D

[Lucy]

Have you done anymore drawings lately?

[lostmaiden]

while I was in between jobs I have been depressed and then I was realy busy with the job, but it is time to work hard and I really really hope that this time I will finally post int hat manga section i created ages ago, since i've been working on some stuff....

[Lucy]

That's good; I'd really like to see some more of your work.

[lostmaiden]

I posted one in my thread in the at section. and I will post some more as soon as they are done. I contacted some ppl that took out an anime magazine with manga made by fans and they seem to like my art. But I would not get payed if I will make a collaboration with them, because they are a non prophit organization. But i am thinking of submitting a manga tho... It is good for the CV,as the woman i talked to said....

[Lucy]

Yeah. I'd do that. It's a great way to get your work noticed.

[lostmaiden]

I got a myspace account!!!! Please visit it www.myspace.com/nekoden

[Lucy]

Very nice, lostmaiden! Love it.